When people fall head over heels in love, they often find themselves ready to make substantial changes. They might quit bad habits, alter their diets, or even refresh their wardrobe. Yet, when it comes to pets, the scenario can be quite different.
A 22-year-old man recently turned to Reddit to share his predicament: his girlfriend of seven months issued him an ultimatum—either he gives up his cherished cat, Mittens, or their relationship ends.
His girlfriend, a staunch vegan, contended that keeping a cat contradicted her ethical beliefs.
In his post, the man detailed: “I’ve been dating my girlfriend for seven months. She’s wonderful, and we’re incredibly compatible in many ways. From the beginning, she made it clear that it was crucial for her that any potential partner shared her cruelty-free values. I was already a pescatarian, so transitioning to a fully plant-based diet was relatively easy for me. My girlfriend was pleased with my shift to a cruelty-free lifestyle, and we quickly became known as ‘the vegan couple’ on our college campus.”
However, Mittens, his beloved cat, remained a point of contention. “I’ve had Mittens for three years, and I love her dearly. She’s a sweet, affectionate cat. Though my girlfriend was initially uneasy around her, she attributed it to not growing up with cats. Eventually, we reached an unspoken agreement to spend most of our time at her place to avoid the issue.”
As their relationship grew stronger during the pandemic, they began discussing the prospect of moving in together. This led to a serious conversation where his girlfriend presented a shocking demand: she couldn’t envision a future with him unless he was willing to part with Mittens. She argued that owning a cat was incompatible with vegan principles due to their carnivorous nature.
“I was taken aback,” he recounted. “I told her I absolutely wasn’t willing to give up Mittens. I pointed out that since she consumed animal products herself, I was minimizing harm by purchasing high-quality cat food. Many vegans have cats and share this perspective. My girlfriend became upset and said, ‘How much meat does your cat consume? How many animals had to die for that food? Would you be okay if that was human flesh?’”
Frustrated, he ended the discussion and left her apartment. Though he sought comfort with Mittens at home, his mood was clouded when his girlfriend sent him a link to a Reddit thread advocating for the extinction of domestic cats.
In a follow-up on r/relationship_advice, he clarified that his girlfriend’s extreme stance on domestic cats was not typical of the broader vegan community. “I think sometimes new vegans can be a bit overzealous. In reality, most of us are just doing our best to avoid causing harm to animals.”
He also revealed that they had ended their relationship. “I would never, ever give up Mittens,” he affirmed. Reflecting on the situation, he acknowledged: “Many commenters suggested that this issue was about control rather than veganism, and upon reflection, I do see a pattern of controlling behavior from my ex-girlfriend.”
Ultimately, he concluded that breaking up was the best choice given the relationship’s challenges. How would you have handled this situation?